Coming Soon.

I am working on a new blog post of my thoughts. As soon as I decide on some thoughts that I can trust you all with. I'm not a very trusting person. I want to tell you things though. And I want desperately to ask you things. But I can't. I can't find an opening to start without betraying myself too much. I don't want you to know that I want to know. There is not enough dialog or conversation in my life anymore. I don't know. This is one of the reasons I hang out with Kym so much. I feel like I can tell her anything. I feel like I truly messed up somewhere recently. Maybe I'm just getting worked up. There are infinite things that you can go back and redo to get a different result, but there are also infinite things that you only get one chance to do forever and afterward you can only guess what it would have been like otherwise. There are some episodes/people/etc. that I sometimes wish I could undo from my experience. My uncertainty has multiplied recently. I thought things would be clearer now. Why am I cursed to regret so much? I feel like it is in my bones.


That doesn't change, of course, the happiness that I feel so often in the present. Like this weekend. Every moment I had a smile on my face I wish I could frame in a gallery. With few exceptions "everything was beautiful, and nothing hurt."